This June I participated in the 30th International Focusing Conference in Vienna – my first – joining a group of 450 Focusers from around the world. We listened, learned, met new people, ate together, danced together, and began to process a little of Gendlin’s history.
A part of this history that stood out was Gendlin’s flight from Vienna with his family in 1938. Having made the desperate decision to flee Nazi persecution, they embarked on the dangerous journey across Europe to Holland. His father had been given one address, a man in Cologne who would help them survive the next stage of their escape. Having finally made it to Cologne, a miracle in itself, Gendlin waited outside ‘the address’ while his father went in to speak with the man:
“When my father came out, he was pale and said: “Let’s go.” Outside he explained that he could not trust this man. My father said that his feeling had said “no” to him. My father had already said this many times: “I follow my feeling.” But at this time, I did not understand what he meant when he said he trusted his feelings. We were in a strange city and without any way out. We had put all our hopes on “the address,” and now this hope was destroyed, only because of what he had “felt.”
I was surprised then and also often asked myself later what kind of feeling it must be that tells you something. Sometimes I tried to find such a feeling within myself, but I could not. But that I started to look for it, had its effect in the end.”*
It’s so deeply touching in this story that a person’s ‘feeling’ could be of use and trusted in such extreme circumstances. We are not all faced with experiences of this severity, although we must recognise that many in the world are. But the story points at something real – that our bodies can be the source of important information. Not only when it is convenient, but when it really counts.
And it’s encouraging to note that from this point on, it was many years before Gendlin found a way to listen to his body’s wisdom. For some of us, hearing what our bodies have to say is easy, but some of us need time and a bit of support. As somebody who has needed a lot of support on that journey, now that I know this story, I feel a little relieved that I’m in such good company.
~ Millie Baker
*Interview by Lore Korbei: https://focusing.org/gendlin/docs/gol_2181.html
